When you’re pregnant again after loss (PAL), it’s so easy to get inside your head. You’ve been introduced to the “baby loss world” and you have suddenly become aware of the many ways a baby can die during pregnancy. It’s so easy to go to a bad place very quickly. For me, affirmations were so important during my pregnancies after loss. They helped me stop. Breathe. And relax. All while quietly reminding myself that “in this moment, everything is okay.”
I also reminded myself that if I was able to give birth to a baby knowing she would die either during labor or shortly thereafter, I could do anything. That was my “I can do hard things, I’ve done the impossible” type mantra that got me through my first pregnancy after losing my first child.
I recently coordinated a yoga retreat for my local pregnancy after loss support group. Picking and reading affirmations was part of the afternoon program, and I wanted to share the affirmations I’ve found. Many are from our PALS founder, Lindsey Henke, and others are from other pregnant after loss parents, or pregnancy affirmation websites I’ve frequented, and even a church marquee I pass by on my way to work. Feel free to add your own or tell us your favorite in the comments below.
I trust in the wisdom of my body to protect this baby and produce life. – Lindsey Henke
I am worthy of this pregnancy, this baby and a beautiful birth! – Lindsey Henke
I can visualize a beautiful birth and coming home with a healthy baby in my arms. – Lindsey Henke
Even though it’s hard as hell to do, I yell back in fear’s face and say today I choose joy! -Lindsey Henke
I possess the strength and courage it take to bring this baby into this world healthy and alive. -Author Unknown
I have to believe that my baby will be born alive and healthy. – Lindsey Henke
This baby growing inside of me is full of life and will live a beautiful one. -Lindsey Henke
My pregnant body is a beautiful vessel that is blooming and creating life. – Lindsey Henke
It is safe for me to be happy during this pregnancy. I deserve this blessing. – Affirmations for Pregnancy Website
I am strong and healthy, and so is the baby I’m creating. – Lindsey Henke
I breathe in strength, and breathe out calm and confidence in my body and my baby. – Lindsey Henke
Replace our worries with peace, our fear with courage. – Church Marquee in Fitchburg, Wisconsin
Let your hope and faith that you will bring your baby home be bigger than your fear that you will not – Adapted from that same church marquee
I can do hard things. I’ve done the impossible. – Franchesca Cox
Just breathe. Everything is going to be okay. – CarlyMarie
Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be. – Sonia Ricotte
This is a different pregnancy, a different baby, a different story, with a different ending. – Lindsey Henke
Here are some prayers or longer pieces that may also serve as helpful reminders to you during PAL.
“Nature, be good to me.
God – or whatever your name may be – please help me get through this pregnancy.
Give me strength.
Calm my heart.
Protect my child.
Please, be with my baby. Please.”
– Alexis Marie Chute, Expecting Sunshine
I deserve this.
It is OK to dream.
It is OK to hope.
Pregnancy can and will be BEAUTIFUL –
for as many days as that may be.
– Franchesca Cox
I have been blessed with the gift of a precious baby.
Each day that passes my love for my child grows deeper.
My baby feels safe and peaceful in my womb.
My body is amazing and wise. It knows exactly what
to do. I invoke all of the love and support from the millions of
woman who have walked this road before me. As I carry and
nurture this new life, I too am held and supported.
I release all fears and any guilt surrounding pregnancy that I
may have felt in the past. I now trust, love and thank my body.
Whenever I feel anxious, I stop and take deep breaths. I
send lovingly, calm thoughts to each cell in my body.
I am calm. I am peaceful. I am strong. I am perfect health.
All is well and safe with my baby and I.
I AM A BEAUTIFUL MOTHER.
– Carly Marie