Tomorrow is New Year’s Eve, and I’m just not quite sure where this year went. Time has flown faster than I ever thought possible. This past year, Teddy turned three in heaven, Nathan turned one in March and is growing so fast, and we found out we were expecting our final child in June after a successful round of fertility medication to help me ovulate. Nathan and I both ended up with Covid this past October (to which we are fine), and my best friend and I dove into running a small business together which we are loving. It’s been a busy year!

Teddy and Nathan's stockings on Christmas

Author’s Personal Collection/Elizabeth Michalski

Last week was abnormal. It was a Christmas that was quieter than usual. While we were able to take Covid tests and see my in-laws on Christmas Eve, I didn’t get to see my own parents as my dad came down with Covid (he’s doing alright!). So, we spent the day getting into Nathan’s new presents, doing a little cooking, and visiting with my best friend and family. I really missed my parents, but it’s not the first holiday Covid kept us apart. The previous Thanksgiving my dad had Covid as well, so video calling is a welcome alternative. We’ll be having our Re-Christmas on New Year’s Day, which I’m very excited about. As my bestie said, we are having two Christmas celebrations in 2022 – so the year already has to be great!

Nathan playing with one of his Christmas presents

Author’s Personal Collection/Elizabeth Michalski

I know I’m going to be adapting in this new year as I hit the big transition, from one baby to two.

I know I’ll have my hands full, Nathan will be just shy of two years old when Delilah arrives. Trying to keep up with the house, having a baby during my husband’s “busy season” with work, keeping up with the business my bestie and I are growing, and juggling two tiny humans will be a lot. Thankfully, I have a wonderful support system that I know I can count on if I start to get overwhelmed.

As the new year hits, I’m getting increasingly anxious that my baby girl will be here in just nine short weeks. I feel like I have so much to do, and no time (or motivation, for that matter). And I’m honestly petrified that Delilah is going to make her arrival a month early, like her brother Nathan did. So my mind is preparing for her to be here in five weeks, which shoots my anxiety up even more. Sure, I may be overthinking things. However, this is my third pregnancy and I have not made it to term with any of my children. Teddy was born sleeping at just 22 weeks, and Nathan showed up at 36 weeks (and thankfully with no NICU time). Does my body even know how to take us to 40 weeks? Will we get to term this time? Can I have everything ready a month early just in case?

Ultrasound of Delilah

Author’s Personal Collection/Elizabeth Michalski

I wish I could say that I wasn’t worried every time I feel like I’m getting a little crampy (and let’s be honest, it’s usually gas – I’m human!). I wish I didn’t have terrifying nightmares from time to time that Delilah didn’t make it, and that I’m going to be reliving my worst day all over again. It’s much easier said than done to stay positive, and I may be holding my breath (mentally, of course) until this is all over. As beautiful as pregnancy can be – and as excited as I get with every hiccup, roll and kick – I’m also very, very ready to not be pregnant again.

Family Selfie - New Year, Letting Go of Fear

Author’s Personal Collection/Elizabeth Michalski

As anxious as I am, I’m doing my best to kick my fears aside and focus on the good to come.

In 2022, my final child, our beautiful Delilah will arrive. The business my bestie and I are running is going to soar even more. I get to watch her get married this year as well and I cannot wait to see the beautiful bride she will be. Nathan will turn 2, Teddy will turn 4, and my husband and I will hit the big 3-0 (yuck, let’s add that to the cons). My hopes for 2022 are the opportunity to spend more time with my family and loved ones, a year of good health, and a safe and sound delivery of our sweet baby girl. What are your hopes for 2022?

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