I’m heartbroken to share that on March 7, 2023, we lost our beloved baby boy Hudson Everett Baker. He was 21 weeks and 4 days along.
On February 24, at a follow-up to our anatomy scan, Hudson was diagnosed with a lethal form of skeletal dysplasia, more commonly known as dwarfism. This diagnosis was completely unexpected, and based on the advice of our maternal fetal medicine doctor and genetic counselor, we made the devastating decision to terminate my very wanted pregnancy.
I feel so lucky to be Huddy’s mama and especially lucky for the weeks I spent bonding with him as he wiggled and kicked in my belly. In some moments, I think, “Maybe we could have known sooner if…” and then I quickly realize that I would not trade the months we had together for anything. The impact of my son and this loss is indescribable, but the happy memories of my pregnancy keep me going: my wife and I talking and singing to our baby, celebrating him with friends and family, planning for a future with him in it. I miss Hudson, and I miss being pregnant with him every day.
My wife, Kellie, has been my rock. Our friends, family, doulas, medical team, therapists, online support groups, and pregnancy loss support organizations have surrounded us so completely. Every bowl of soup left on our doorstep, every text message saying, “Thinking of you, Kellie, and Hudson,” and every candle lit in his memory have meant more to me than I could ever put into words.
I so loved sharing my pregnancy here on the Bump Day Blog, the ups and the downs. I treasure this written record of Hudson’s life. I hope that you will join us in remembering and celebrating Hudson today.
*A Note from PALS: For ways to support Alli and Kellie as they navigate this devastating loss, please visit their support page.
Read more bump day blogs from Alli:
- Alli’s Bump Day Blog, Week 18: Managing Anatomy Scan Anxiety
- Alli’s Bump Day Blog, Week 17: Planning Ahead
- Alli’s Bump Day Blog, Week 16: Reassurance
- Alli’s Bump Day Blog, Week 15: The Wait Between Appointments
- Alli’s Bump Day Blog, Week 14: Adulting